As Tall As Lions Kick Off The Semester Right
September 1, 2010
By KYLE SHEARIN

Marie Sicola/Bullet
To welcome back old students and help ease new ones into the occasionally exciting life at UMW, alternative-rock band As Tall As Lions performed in Ball Circle on Friday night.
If you’ve never heard their music, imagine a more atmospheric version of Snow Patrol with Jeff Buckley as the front man. This makes the band’s intimate but powerful sonic texture quite fitting for small clubs but also translated to an outside venue surprisingly well.
The band’s onstage presence was a little awkward at first, as it was a little hard to distinguish if they were trying to be funny or just saying whatever came to mind. The band’s tight playing secured the crowd’s interest throughout though and impressively brought the life out of their recordings.
Eventually the audience loosened up, and the band seemed to be enjoying themselves immensely. A running joke during the concert was that the members of As Tall As Lion’s were part of the graduating class of UMW in the early ‘90s but couldn’t remember which year exactly.
The funniest moment of the night was the impromptu hot dog eating contest between three students halfway through the band’s set. It gave the whole evening a distinctly summery vibe.
If the sleeping gentleman sprawled out next to me was any indication, As Tall As Lions can be a very relaxing band. If I can fault them for anything, the show offered very little thrills for those not already diehard fans.
Nitpicking aside, As Tall As Lions was received well and hopefully secured a place in many freshmen’s hearts as the first band they saw play at UMW.
“LIMBO”: Entering A Hostile World, Alone
September 1, 2010
By EVAN FRITZ
The video game industry is beginning to show signs of growing pains. In the midst of a recession, developers are lining up to show gamers, more than ever, why their game stands out from the rest and deserve the consumer’s well-earned money with ad campaigns designed to lure potential customers with boisterous visuals and sound.
Overall, it is just a noisy time in the video game sector, for better or for worse. It is a shame that lying beneath all this noise are games such as “LIMBO” which are meant to be discovered instead of being delivered to the eyes of the consumer via an advertisement.
This sense of quiet discovery is central to the game of “LIMBO,” wherein a minimal amount of context is given to the player as he or she traverses a stark and forebodingly alien environment. That is for the individual player to decide. I am simply aiding an argument as to why any person remotely interested in the interactive electronic medium should play this game, how it stands out from the crowd of games, and (in a nutshell) why it is worth your cold hard cash. On to brass tax.
The first thing you will notice about “LIMBO” is its art style. Everything is in black and white and is represented by a silhouette. Be it a tree, crate, or a… creature. Not only does this give off a very dark and grainy atmosphere, but it lends a dreamlike quality to the proceedings of the visuals. Since all you see are silhouettes, you don’t see any specific details of each object, leading the player to sometimes take a guess at what they are seeing, or get closer and discover the consequences of being curious without being cautious.
That being said, this game is begging to be played in a dark and secluded area where you aren’t rushing through the game, but rather discovering the world you are in along with the game’s protagonist at your own pace. There is no intro cutscene, no prelude. You are a boy who wakes up in a dark forest, looking for your sister. That is all the info you are given before being thrust into a dangerous world by yourself.
“LIMBO” does an excellent job of transitioning its gameplay mechanics. It took me a while to realize after playing through it, but “LIMBO” subtly transforms from a platforming/adventure game into a puzzle game. A good amount of the puzzles in “LIMBO” revolve around the game’s physics system, which adheres to concepts of weight, inertia, and even rudimentary forms of velocity. This is all backed by an elegant and intuitive control scheme: you move with the Xbox 360’s left analog stick, jump with A, and interact with the environment using B. In this way there is no barrier for entry due to the control setup.
What sets “LIMBO” apart from its platforming peers is its atmosphere and mood. It exudes a sense of vulnerability as you travel throughout the world. It feels as if the world itself is out to kill you in any way imaginable, and kill you it (inevitably) will. Any way you slice it, be it a hidden bear trap, a pit of spikes, or various denizens of the woods you will suffer several sudden and gruesome ends. Even the camera angle within the game makes it seem as if you are being watched at all times, as objects slowly shift in the foreground. All of this is intended.
A grim process of trial and error is applied to many of the environmental hurdles within the game. What this does is make the player exceedingly cautious and paranoid of his surroundings. This leads to some truly delicious moments where in order to proceed you need to trust yourself and move closer to what seems to be imminent danger.
The audio is also expertly produced in “LIMBO.” For the most part all you hear are ambient sound effects and occasionally ambient tonal “music” which ranges anywhere from a gloomy bass drone to a bright arpeggiated chord progression in moments of “clarity” within the game.
All in all, “LIMBO” is like the darker cousin of an oft-forgotten game called “Ecco the Dolphin” for the Sega Genesis. Instead of trying to find your pod, you are on a quest to find your sister. Instead of swimming in the deep blue ocean, you are traversing through a deep forest/industrial area. And instead of being hunted by octopi and sharks you are being stalked by something more… creepy and eight-legged.
Both of these games are case-studies in loneliness as you navigate a world that most definitely does not want to be your friend. But through all the gloominess of “LIMBO” is a game worth anyone’s $15 (Xbox Live Arcade). Before all the noise of midterms and finals, find some time to download this game, plug in some headphones to your TV and enjoy the quiet solitude with “LIMBO.” The experience will stay with you long after you’re done.
Scott Pilgrim: Flawed Hero of Electric Awesomeness
September 1, 2010
By MADELINE MCDONALD and NATHAN BEMIS
“Scott Pilgrim vs. The World” is a movie that didn’t do so well in the box office, but it’s definitely one you should see. It’s a story of romance, epic battles wielded with fists and guitars and second chances. It’s packed with amazing visual effects, witty one-liners and face-melting music, and it’s definitely worth the price of admission.
Scott Pilgrim is your everyday not-so-great guy who falls for Ramona Flowers, a woman with “baggage” in the form of seven evil ex-boyfriends he must confront and defeat. The role of Scott Pilgrim is a huge departure from Michael Cera’s usual wimpy hipster nerd persona. In this film, he’s kind of a jerk—but the kind of jerk that everyone might lapse into from time to time.
His flaws and mistakes make him relatable to real people. For example, he avoids breaking up with his initial high school girlfriend, Knives Chau, due to cowardice that leads to a messy end to their relationship. At the end of the day though, he’s a welcome change from the typical knight in shining armor in most blockbuster films.
Mary Elizabeth Winstead plays Scott’s love interest, Ramona Flowers, an aloof, cool girl who travels Toronto on roller skates making deliveries for Amazon. However, this aloofness keeps us from really getting to know her or why Scott is so in love with her. The film’s two-hour runtime also rushes the development of their relationship, which is better portrayed in the comic book series.
These complaints aside, the movie is absolutely amazing. The film is punctuated by colorful visual effects that turn Scott Pilgrim’s world into a place where people shoot fireballs out of their hands, mystical battle dragons are born from synthesizer keyboards, and defeated opponents burst into piles of spare change.
Comic book visual effects are also at play here, especially in the quick transitions between scenes. Sound effects are also visualized, such as the “ding dong” of a doorbell appearing as literal text onscreen. All these make for an explosive action film packed with quirky humor.
The soundtrack is also fantastic, featuring songs written by Beck for Scott’s band, Sex Bob-omb, as well as songs by Metric and Broken Social Scene. Metric’s “Black Sheep” is a sexy, surreal track featuring Emily Haines’ haunting voice telling the story of a relationship gone bad.
Equally memorable are the hilarious songs performed by Broken Social Scene masquerading as the band Crash and the Boys. These songs parody the crushing depression of emo culture with titles like “I’m So Sad, So Very, Very Sad” and “We Hate You, Please Die.” One of the fight scenes is even set to a Bollywood dance number.
“Scott Pilgrim vs. the World” has a little something for everybody. It’s a love story with high-flying fistfights. It’s a gamer’s movie that still maintains a unique indie-hipster chic. But more than anything, it’s two hours of adrenaline-pumping, awe-inspiring, I’d-totally-buy-the-t-shirt greatness that demands to be seen and heard. So what are you waiting for?
“The Expendables”: Explosions, Muscles, and Fictional Latino Dictators
September 1, 2010
If you have any qualms about seeing “The Expendables,” know this: it’s exactly what the previews told you it was, a big action movie with a lot of burly men blowing up the army of a fake Latin country. Decide whether that’s enough for you.
For those still reading, the plot here is basically just an excuse to blow things up. Mr. Church, played by Bruce Willis, hires a group of mercenaries, featuring Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham and Jet Li, to kill the dictator of Vilena, a fictional island country somewhere in the Gulf of Mexico.
Further complications revolve around a girl on the island that Stallone’s character develops a soft spot for, but even this is still just thin justification to blow more stuff up.
For some, maybe not enough stuff gets blown up. All in all, there are only four action scenes in the film: one at the start, two in the middle, and one for the big finish. It might not be enough for some that the whole movie isn’t one long, 103-minute action sequence, but the dramatic scenes in the middle actually help develop a few of the characters a bit.
An attempt to develop Li’s character through his Napoleon complex is cute, but we never actually learn anything about him beyond the fact that he really doesn’t like to be beaten by dudes bigger than him.
Speaking of big dudes, “Stone Cold” Steve Austin does a good job standing there menacingly and throwing people around, but the real standout in the action scenes is Statham, who can throw a knife like nobody’s business. Well, I guess it might be the business of the poor Latino guy on the other end of that knife.
If you’re expecting “There Will Be Blood,” then this movie isn’t for you. However, if you actually like to have stupid fun once in awhile, this is a movie to go see.
LOST: The Complete Collection Unveiled
September 1, 2010
By JOSHUA LAWSON
After six years, with hundreds of questions and thousands of obscenities yelled at television screens in confused desperation, “LOST” finally came to an end this past May. Since then, fans have wandered the streets aimlessly, their Tuesday nights devoid of meaning.
With the recent release of “LOST: The Complete Collection” on DVD and Blu-ray, which contains over 5,000 minutes of footage, there is now enough “LOST” for every day of the week.
Packaged in a box that appears to have been recovered from the infamous four-toed statue itself, this impressive set is filled to the brim with goodies for fans.
Included are a gorgeous map of the island, a booklet of episode synopses, an ankh containing a hidden message from Jacob, a journal page from the Black Rock, the mysterious board game Jacob and the Man-in-Black play on the beach, a Dharma Initiative black light and a hidden bonus disc that will easily take a good hour to find.
With packaging that so perfectly embodies the spirit of the show, it’s easy to forget about the discs themselves, but as many “LOST” fans know, the bonus features hold perhaps the most exciting content of all.
“The Complete Collection” (as well as the Final Season, for those who don’t wish to spend $149.99) features “The New Man in Charge,” a 10-minute epilogue giving a glimpse into Hurley and Ben’s partnership.
It’s an excellent addition to the “LOST” lexicon sure to please any fan of the show. Some loose ends are tied up (one which has been a thorn in the side of “LOST” fans since the first season), there’s a surprise appearance by a long-absent character, and a new chapter in the history of the island is left open for speculation.
“LOST: The Complete Collection” is a terrific set that offers more than the sum of its six seasons’ parts. While owners of the previous five seasons of the show may prefer buying the Final Season to complete their collection, anybody leaning towards the purchase of “The Complete Collection” should blow open the hatch and dive in.
Upsets, Awkwardness, and Predictability at the Emmys
September 1, 2010
Last Sunday, the 62nd Primetime Emmy Awards opened with the cast of “Glee,” Joel McHale, Tina Fey, John Hamm, Kate Gosselin, Randy Jackson and host Jimmy Fallon all singing and dancing to a version of “Born to Run” by Bruce Springsteen. It was a great way to open the show and grabbed the audience’s attention. Here’s a rundown of the big winners and losers of the show.
Much to the dismay of its rabid fans, in its final season, “LOST” was completely shut out and left without a single award.
The cast and crew of “Modern Family,” however, were on a roll. Not only did they perform a great comedy sketch early in the show, featuring George Clooney and Stewie from “Family Guy,” the new series won six out of the fourteen awards for which it was nominated, the most for a television series this year. Some of these included Outstanding Comedy Series and Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series.
In fact, “Modern Family” ended up stealing the limelight from “Glee,” which only won four of the nineteen awards it was nominated for, proving that too much hype may not be a good thing.
There were a few upsets when it came to the awards. “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” won the award for Outstanding Variety, Musical, or Comedy Series for the eighth consecutive year, besting the short-lived “Tonight Show with Conan O’Brien.”
For the first time in its eight-year history, “The Amazing Race” did not win the award for Best Reality Competition. Instead, “Top Chef” took home the award to the surprise of many. “Mad Men” won for Outstanding Drama Series, beating out the final season of “LOST” as well as “True Blood.”
Among actors and actresses, Jim Parsons of “The Big Bang Theory” took home the award for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series, Jane Lynch of “Glee” took home the award for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series, Bryan Cranston, of “Breaking Bad” took home Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series, and Edie Falco took home Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series for “Nurse Jackie.”
Bucky Gunts won for Outstanding Directing for a Variety, Music or Comedy Special for the Opening Ceremony of the 2010 Olympic Games, and whose odd name was the inspiration for a few jokes throughout the night.
“Temple Grandin,” an HBO movie about autistic animal researcher and autism advocate, Temple Grandin, won seven awards, including Outstanding Television Movie. Grandin herself was in attendance and was often seen cheering when the movie won awards.
Host Jimmy Fallon’s numerous attempts at singing throughout the night, except for the opening number, were awkward and more annoying than funny. Almost as awkward as Fallon though, was the order of awards.
The awards were given out for comedies, then dramas, then miniseries/tv movies. For someone whose only interested in one of those, like comedy, having to sit through two hours of random awards waiting for Best Comedy Series to be presented is not fun. They should have mixed up the order to keep things fresh and hold the viewer’s attention.
Despite some upsets, the Emmys were, as usual, somewhat predictable and merely showed what the critics think we should be watching.
Entertaining Yourself at UMW
August 19, 2010
How many Mary Washington students does it take to change a light bulb? The entire campus, because there’s nothing else to do.
No matter how good your high school cafeteria’s food actually was, people still complained about it. Same goes for UMW. You’ll quickly learn that no matter how much stuff is actually going on around campus, people will still complain that there’s just nothing to do here. Don’t believe them.
My first week during freshman year, I basically just spent the entire time walking around campus by myself doing absolutely nothing and having awkward meals with my two random roommates. Uncomfortable silences during dinner only get better during the walk back to the room.
That’s why I want you to know about some of the events happening on campus soon. For instance, the band, As Tall As Lions, is playing a free show in Ball Circle next Friday at 5:30 p.m. After listening to a few of their songs on Facebook, they strike me as a more laid back Coldplay. Take your roommates, enjoy the music and make some friends.
Last year, rapper Talib Kweli absolutely tore the roof off of Dodd Auditorium, indie darlings Jukebox the Ghost had a self-conscious crowd at downtown’s Eyeclops Studios bouncing, and rap rockers Gym Class Heroes shook Dodd hard enough that even students studying in Trinkle were bobbing their heads. Good bands come to UMW and downtown Fredericksburg often enough; you just have to be vigilant about keeping up with the schedules.
If you’re looking to get involved in some fun groups, UMW has you covered. Our One Note Stand a cappella singing group will have auditions in duPont room 209 on Aug. 25 at 7 p.m., so it’s your chance to finally be able to recreate Lady GaGa’s “Poker Face” using only your voice.
You like making people laugh right? Of course you do! Well, yhe Undeniably Adjacent, UMW’s improv comedy team, will be having their auditions on Aug. 30 at 9 p.m. upstairs in Trinkle. I’ve been to a handful of their shows and they’re really funny so it’d definitely be a really fun group to join.
If neither of those interest you though, the Club Carnival is on Aug. 25 at 3 p.m. in Ball Circle, so you should easily be able to find something you like. In my freshman year, I joined Latin Dance Club and Fencing Club, getting me that much closer to my life goal of becoming Zorro.
But if you want something a little more immediate, come to the patio just outside of The Underground lounge at Lee Hall on Aug. 22 from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. for free lemonade, $1 hot dogs, and a chance to win a mountain bike.
What I’m getting at here is that there’s plenty to do at Mary Washington. Keep reading the Bullet and check out our weekly Bullet Points feature and you’ll stay up to date on all the exciting things to do on and off-campus. If you feel like there’s nothing to do here, you just aren’t looking hard enough.
Jukebox The Ghost Resurrects Dead Crowd
April 22, 2010

(Thomas Ella/Bullet)
As I waded through the dull, lifeless crowd on Saturday at Eyeclops Studios before Jukebox the Ghost came out, I thought I must have stumbled into a wax museum.
Despite Drink Up Buttercup’s best efforts, showcasing excellent stage presence with lots of energy and enthusiasm, the crowd simply could not be swayed; they were here to see Jukebox the Ghost and would settle for nothing less. And so they simply stared down Drink Up Buttercup until their set was over.
It’s a shame too, since Drink Up Buttercup actually put on a great show. They played catchy, energetic music, tried to joke and interact with the crowd and worked up sweats from leaping around stage so much. I don’t think I’ve ever watched someone bang on a trash can lid with so much fervor. Yet the crowd remained totally motionless.
Probably one of the most awkwardly gratifying experiences to have at a concert is to literally be the only one dancing. Sure, it’s kind of embarrassing for the people I came with, but somebody needed to start the show. What’s the point of going to a concert if you’re just going to stand there?
On the other hand, considering that my group had called ahead in an attempt to arrive just as Jukebox the Ghost were coming on, completely missing The Vermillions and most of Drink Up Buttercup, I can’t really be too self-righteous. We were just adding to the mob of people there for Jukebox the Ghost.
The crowd politely clapped and cheered as Drink Up Buttercup left the stage, but I couldn’t tell if they were actually clapping for Drink Up Buttercup’s performance or if they were just excited that Jukebox the Ghost were finally going to play.
Either way, when Jukebox the Ghost came on stage, the crowd began to show signs of life. They sang along, clapped to the beat, and suddenly I wasn’t the only one dancing anymore. Mind you, that’s only if you stretch your definition of “dancing” to include “awkward shuffling from side to side.” Eventually the crowd shed some of their self-consciousness and started having fun, but they definitely had a rough start.
Then again, so did Jukebox the Ghost’s performance. A girl with a hand covering her mouth and nose ran through the crowd toward the bathroom, discovering the most effective way to get out of tightly packed social situations quickly. Minutes later, an overwhelming stench permeated the room until even the band itself couldn’t help but comment on it.
“It smells so bad in here,” laughed one of the band members between songs. An Eyeclops Studios employee lit a handful of incense to combat the odor, eliciting cheers from the crowd and the band. “We’ll only play mellow songs from now on,” they joked.
Thankfully, everything else went smoothly. As someone who typically doesn’t like indie rock and had no prior experience with Jukebox the Ghost, I didn’t go in with high hopes but left quite impressed. Keyboardist Ben Thornewill tapped infectious melodies as he belted out strong, clear vocals. Guitarist Tommy Siegel and drummer Jesse Kristin both played extremely well and perfectly complemented the music, but Thornewill was the one who left a lasting impression on me.
By the time the band had finished playing some of their standout hits like “Hold It In,” “Good Day,” “Under My Skin” and some material from their upcoming album, the crowd was finally getting into the music, throwing their hands in the air and jumping around like idiots, just like you’re supposed to at a concert. Somehow, Jukebox the Ghost had found a way to raise the dead and were rewarded with chants of “encore!” that they happily obliged.
‘Kick-Ass’ Is A Bloody Good Time
April 21, 2010
by DAVID TINDELL
Dave Lizewski, bored of simply existing through his teenage years, sets out to kick some local crime ass. However, his petty crime fight quickly gets involved into a brawl with the evil drug lord Frank D’Amico. Luckily, he meets up with Big Daddy, a former cop who has trained his 11-year-old daughter, Hit-Girl, to fight like the rest of the boys.
Kick-Ass turns to Hit-Girl and asks, “How do I get a hold of you?”
Hit-Girl replies sarcastically, “You just contact the Mayor’s office, he has a special signal he shines in the sky. It’s in the shape of a giant c***.”
Premiering last Thursday, “Kick-Ass,” produced by Matthew Vaughn and Brad Pitt, is a superhero film based on the comic book of the same name. When I first saw the trailer, I had no interest in seeing “Kick-Ass.” The trailer told of a nerdy kid who decides to wear tights and perform good deeds, which meant the movie was essentially “Spider-Man” without any cool effects or Kirsten Dunst wet-shirt sequences. However, I noticed the movie was rated R, looked up the “not safe for all audiences” trailer (look it up–it’s hilarious) and I was impressed.
If you did not guess from the quote, the main treat of the movie is the dialogue. Who could not fall in love with an 11-year-old girl who calls people “c****?” Seriously, Hit-Girl’s constant swearing is an instant classic in my collection. Beyond her potty mouth, the movie is generally funny. I actually liked Nicolas Cage in “Kick-Ass,” which is hard for me to admit because I remember “Captain Corelli’s Madoline.” Also, “Kick-Ass” finds itself within the series of movies starring “Superbad” star Christopher Mintz-Plasse (McLovin’), after “Year One” and “Role Models.”
But does the movie actually kick ass? Yes, I was very pleased with the action. First of all, the action is spread nicely throughout the movie. One of the very first scenes portrays Nicolas Cage shooting his daughter in the chest, and the action only continues from there. The action is also bloody; expect a lot of head shots, throats being cut, thugs exploding in microwaves and bodies crushed by car compactors. Honestly, the action was very enjoyable to watch. I was surprised how amusing it was to watch Hit-Girl stab drug dealer after drug dealer. It never gets old.
However, “Kick-Ass” does not break away from the common super-hero tropes. Boy meets girl he tries to impress (like “Spider-Man”), boy’s friend is actually a bad guy (like “Spider-Man”), and boy’s body is reconstructed after an accident which makes him stronger (Wolverine from “X-Men”). It almost makes you wonder if the movie is meant to satirize the comic book series, but you be the judge. Even still, the character development added comical flare which helped the movie transition nicely. For example, Dave gets to know the love of his life better by becoming her gay friend. What a genius move.
“Kick-Ass” is a good laugh with an enjoyable, action-jolted plot.
Top 5 Distracting Sites During Finals
April 21, 2010
by ISAAC WHALEN
Exam time is upon us, but fortunately we live in a world with the Internet. How many times have we sat down to write a paper, and then been distracted by those glorious multiple tabs? This list will keep you away from your work for hours upon end. So minimize all your other windows and get ready for a much needed study break–you can finish that essay tomorrow before your first class.
1. Hulu.com: With a wide selection of TV shows, movies, documentaries and movie trailers, Hulu is the perfect way of putting off that paper or studying for the big exam. I personally enjoy wasting time at this website, because not only can I discover shows that are off the air, but I can also catch episodes of newer shows that I missed. Viewers with an account can subscribe to series and have new episodes saved to their profile. Hulu is truly one of the Internet’s greatest places to procrastinate. Site recommendations: Archer, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Community.
2. Facebook.com: A very popular website, Facebook is definitely a part of time-wasting royalty. No need explaining the massive amounts of quizzes, photo stalking, IM chatting and status updating that goes on at this site, because we all have done it at one point. Facebook is unique because it gives the user a false sense of activity while not actually accomplishing anything. I enjoy procrastinating here, because I can find out who else is wasting time with me. It’s a kind of community of slackers all in one place. Site recommendations: putting parents on limited profile, deleting status updates from people who treat the site like Twitter.
3. Collegehumor.com: This site definitely holds its own against all challengers. With funny videos, articles, comics and links to hundreds of other sites, College Humor is definitely a good time waster. This site has such a wide selection of original series they created their own TV show on MTV in 2009. Also, the site has a lot of really funny articles and good links to web comics and other humor sites. What I really enjoy about this site is that since their content is based on college life, it is easily relatable. Site recommendations: Jake and Amir, Hardly Working.
4. Superpoop.com: Now don’t let the name fool you; this site is actually a web comic. By using real photographs and humorous text, creator “Drew” makes comics about almost everything. This site is just one of the creator’s three web comics and has links to his wife’s comic, “Natalie Dee.” While the humor might not be for everyone, it certainly is a cool place to forget about your three-page paper due tomorrow or your group meeting that you just missed. Site recommendations: check out the links to the other web comics
5. Cracked.com: Updated daily, this humor site has hundreds of articles from everyone from staff writers to contributing users. What is cool about this site is that most of their articles are lists, stating the five or seven best something-or-others, like this article. The site also has many Photoshop contests. With a large archive of past articles and photo contests, Cracked will keep you entertained and sufficiently distracted. Site recommendations: Articles, Photoshop contests, Craptions contest


